white fragility

America continues to gaslight Black people about racism

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This past Monday was the Martin Luther King Jr. federal holiday, and if you ever needed an example of how America continues to gaslight Black people and play in our faces, look no further than the tweet the FBI sent out in “commemoration” of that day. 

“This #MLKDay, the #FBI honors one of the most prominent leaders of the Civil Rights movement and reaffirms its commitment to Dr. King’s legacy of fairness and equal justice for all,” their social media person wrote as a caption to a photo of the MLK monument in Washington, D.C.

A Twitter community note added to the tweet said, “The FBI engaged in the surveillance of King, attempted to discredit him, and used manipulation tactics to influence him to stop organizing. King’s family believe the FBI was responsible for his death.”

America continues to gaslight Black people about racism

Let’s talk about some words that trigger white people

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Moist. 

“Moist” is a polarizing word out here in these streets. There are so many people I know who hate the word “moist,” and I don’t know why.

Is it because it sounds wet when people say it? Is it the weird combination of letters used to spell it? Why do people hate the word “moist” so much? 

There have been many articles written over the years that have tried to explain why people have such a bad reaction to that word.

My editor, Genetta Adams, is one of those people who doesn’t like the word moist. When I asked her why, she said, “It’s stupid for me not to like it, and I know it’s stupid, but the way you say the word ‘moist’ just sounds nasty.

“Only weird and gross things are described as moist,” she continued. “That’s basically it. It just sounds wrong. It just sounds icky.”

“Cake is the only good thing that is described as moist,” she added. “Otherwise, it just feels like you are describing something dark and dirty.”

Most people recognize that their aversion to the word “moist” is irrational, and their reactions to hearing it usually never extend beyond cringing, shaking their head or asking the person to stop saying it. 

I’m sure they recognize the word is not actively harming them, so they don’t have to treat it like a grenade. 

I wish the same could be said about (some) white people and certain words that seem to trigger (some of) them whenever they hear them or see them in print. 

The words that seem to feel like hot grits on the delicate and fragile skin of (some) white people are “white,” “race,” “racism,” and “racist.”

Let’s talk about some words that trigger white people

Here’s what Sarah Jane Comrie could do to fix the Citi Bike situation, but she won’t

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We are upset because Sarah Jane Comrie chose to react in a way that was too over the top for the type of dispute that was happening at that moment. 

The boy’s side of the story has now come out, and we’ve learned that she initially asked three of the boys in the video if she could take their bikes, and after being told “no” by all three, she proceeded to try and commandeer the bike of the boy we see resisting her in the video. 

His side of the story makes her look so much worse. She comes off as entitled at the very least, but the history of white women weaponizing their whiteness and tears in the name of causing trouble for Black people is what has people — Black people in particular — on edge. 

Here’s what Sarah Jane Comrie could do to fix the Citi Bike situation, but she won’t

Mother Of Teen In Citi Bike Video Speaks Out: ‘No One Bothered To Ask Him What Happened’

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“This situation is really driving me crazy and making me sick,” Betty said. “We have never been in this situation before.”

“We came to this country to make a better life for our kids,” she continued. “We are not thieves. Just because we are poor doesn’t mean we are thieves.”

Betty said Michael had to stay home from school for a few days because of the mental anguish of the incident and all that has come after it.

“As a mother, you don’t want to see your child like that,” she said.

Betty said she was horrified when she first saw the video.

“My reaction when I saw it was ‘oh my God. I almost lost my son in that moment.’ Do you understand me? I am not from here, but we all know this country,” she said. “But how the policemen here do our sons, and our husbands, and our fathers. They kill us.”

Mother Of Teen In Citi Bike Video Speaks Out: ‘No One Bothered To Ask Him What Happened’

Accountability is like kryptonite to whiteness

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The racist mob has tried to make the narrative be about everything but Sarah Jane Comrie’s behavior in the video — even though it’s her behavior that everyone is upset about. 

There is a reason for this. 

Accountability is like kryptonite to whiteness. Whiteness does not like being held accountable. Whiteness doesn’t like seeing white people being held accountable. 

Accountability is like kryptonite to whiteness

The ‘receipts’ don’t matter. The bike doesn’t matter. Sarah Jane Comrie’s actions matter

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Her lawyer’s statements in the media are meant to obfuscate the actual issue at hand. He is making it about whether or not she tried to steal a bike and whether or not she actually paid for said bike, but even he has to know on some level that’s not the real issue. 

Judging by his statements in defense of her, the employment lawyer representing Sarah Jane Comrie understands that her very loud and public outburst where she weaponizes her tears and begins screaming for help even when she was in no imminent danger is the issue. 

People who saw that video understood exactly what Sarah Jane Comrie was doing. It was evident in the smug look you see on her face right before she began screaming for help. 

Attorney Justin Marino knows that even Sarah Jane Comrie’s employer, NYC Health + Hospitals called her behavior in the video “disturbing.”

The ‘receipts’ don’t matter. The bike doesn’t matter. Sarah Jane Comrie’s actions matter

White People Like Sarah Jane Comrie Always Get The Benefit Of The Doubt

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It’s really funny the way white people get all up in arms about one of their own being dragged through the media, but they have no issue with it when it’s a Black victim having their past dredged up in the wake of their murder ala Jordan Neely. The hypocrisy is blinding and white. 

Adding to the madness is a follow-up article from the New York Post in which they claim to have receipts sent to them by Justin Marino, an employment lawyer defending Sarah Jane Comrie to help her keep her job with NYC Health + Hospitals (NYC H+H). 

Marino claims the alleged receipts prove that Comrie rented the bike first and it was immediately put back in the rack one minute later, and then she rented another shortly thereafter. 

The Post follow-up was written after Marino sent a letter in response to their original article.

White People Like Sarah Jane Comrie Always Get The Benefit Of The Doubt

White fragility *is* white violence

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“I consider my writing to be a form of activism. It is my way of using my voice, my natural writing ability, and my words to speak up for myself and other Black people. 

It is a form of protest, in my opinion, and baby, protest is not supposed to make you feel comfortable. 

If you, as a white person, feel personally attacked by the things I say and write, that requires a level of self analysis that I can’t help you with. It’s not up to me to smooth it over for you and make it easier for you to digest.”

The frustrations of a Black woman who writes about race

Sometimes, being Black in AmeriKKKa can make you want to scream

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I don’t want to have to worry about white people policing me, trying to “put me in my place,” being suspicious of me simply because I am Black and taking every opportunity to foist their opinions or their “advice” on me.

It Is Absolutely Exhausting Being Black in America

White people lose their shit every Black History Month. Why?

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The problem is that whiteness is centered so much in our world, people like this don’t know how to respond when it isn’t. White people don’t have to worry about their “culture” being left out of anything, because it’s always present, but they still complain when they can’t see themselves in something. They will even go so far as to insert themselves where they don’t belong.

Why Can’t We Just Enjoy Black History Month?

Auntie Unfiltered and Uncle Michael Discuss White Fragility

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If you know anything about me, you know I love me some Michael Harriot. He is a brilliant thinker, writer, historian, and storyteller.

We’ve worked together for the last six years, but he’s also a dearly loved friend, so any opportunity I get to spend time with him and do a project with him, I take it.

This is an episode from Auntie Unfiltered, a video series I created at The Root.

Auntie Unfiltered and Uncle Michael Discuss White Fragility