One day I woke up and realized I am the prize

Once my focus was taken off turning myself into “wife material,” I was able to devote that energy to improving and evolving me for me. Regular talks with my therapist, a lot of self-critique-turned-into-active improvements and consistently listening to myself helped me to improve my relationship with myself as well as others around me. 

My life changed for the better once I decentered romance

For theGrio, I discuss how my life changed once I de-centered romance.

More
  • October 24, 2022

The Cardinal Divas are a majorette dance squad similar in nature to those mostly seen on the campuses of our nation’s HBCUs. Part spirit squad, part dance troupe, and always killing the game, these dance squads do something known as “j-setting,” a style of dance popularized by the squad at Jackson State University. Unlike white majorettes, Black majorettes do away with the traditional batons in favor of high kicks and mind-blowing choreography that can be done sitting in the stands as well as on the field.

Why are so many Black people bothered by the new Black majorette squad at USC? 
(more…)
More
  • September 26, 2022

You see, those on the right have been engaged in a game of wordplay that has them redefining words and phrases to fit their various propaganda campaigns. Three very loud examples that come to mind are the word “woke” and the phrases “critical race theory” and “quiet quitting.” Stick with me and I’ll explain to you what I mean. 

Word games and propaganda campaigns: The right is weaponizing language against us
More
  • September 14, 2022

It really bothers (some) white people that Black people get cast in their favorite make-believe stories. Maybe we are infringing on their ability to make believe that we don’t exist. Whatever the case may be, it’s seriously time to get over it, like Whoopi said

When you can imagine dragons but not imagine Black people in fantasy stories, your racism is showing
More
  • September 8, 2022

Have you ever watched Serena on the court? It is almost as if she has a choreographer who plots out her moves for her. She is aware of the ball and her body at all times. She moves around the court with a speed and gracefulness that almost makes it look easy. Almost. 

There are no qualifiers needed. Serena Williams is the greatest athlete of all time, and here are a few reasons why
More
  • September 2, 2022

Who was the first white woman to lie on a Black man? Who was the first white woman to use her tears to try and get a Black man in trouble, or worse—killed? Who was the first white woman who realized if she put out her best crocodile tears, it could gain her the results she was looking for?

Terrell Owens finds out the hard way that white women have perfected weaponizing their tears against Black men
More
  • August 5, 2022

Anyway, the other subset of people were white people who generally agreed with what I said about Bodega Bro, but they were given pause because in my headline I said “Bodega Bro is the epitome of everything white people do wrong on a daily basis.” They all got stuck on the “white people” part, and they all wanted to lecture me about how I shouldn’t lump everyone together in one category. 

Selective offense and ‘not all white people’: We shouldn’t have to keep coddling y’all 
More
  • July 18, 2022

Except as we all know, people’s attitudes about who should and shouldn’t be able to bear arms and carry them in public tend to shift greatly when it comes to Black people owning guns. And we all know this is due to the implicit bias buried deep in this country’s DNA that causes white people to view Black people as some sort of ongoing threat. 

Why is open carry only an issue when it comes to Black folks? 
More
  • July 11, 2022

Because of my close relationship with music, I have had the opportunity to repeatedly listen to songs and analyze their lyrical content. I have to say, what passed for good music back in the day would really get the side-eye today—not because the music is bad, but because at times the subject matter or the lyrics raise some eyebrows and questions.

So-called ‘romantic’ songs with very questionable lyrics
More
  • June 29, 2022

Listen. If Kandi doesn’t do anything else, she is going to give you a catchy bop to sing along to. After all, this is the woman who penned “No Scrubs,” “Bills, Bills, Bills,” “Tardy for the Party,” “The Ring Didn’t Mean a Thing,” and who has writing credits on “Bug a Boo,” “There You Go,” and “U and Dat.” She knows her way around a hit.

‘Legs and hips and bawdeeeeee’: Kandi Burruss has given us our summer earworm
More
  • May 31, 2022

If what Whitlock believes is true, then my eyes have been opened. If fact-based criticism is offensive enough to make cops abrogate their professional duties and the very foundation of why they exist, then I finally understand why America is like this. According to Whitlock, it is crazy to expect police officers to live up to their pledge to protect and serve and be held responsible by the people who pay them. Next, you’ll be telling me that Black people want this country to live up to its pledge that “all men are created equal” and treat them equally, too!

What Jason Whitlock can teach us about white people, cops and America 
More
  • May 27, 2022

“I’m a man whose greatest wealth and honor is my family. That’s number one. I’m a person who cares a lot about young people,” he says. “…I guess I’m an artist. I’m a person who is driven to contribute stories to people, and I think in some ways the job of the artist is to reflect the most intimate parts of themselves to others.”

O-T FAGBENLE IS SHOWING US A DIFFERENT SIDE OF BARACK OBAMA ON THE FIRST LADY
More
  • May 26, 2022

“About a third of our population is African American; African Americans have a higher incidence of maternal mortality. So, if you correct our population for race, we’re not as much of an outlier as it’d otherwise appear. Now, I say that not to minimize the issue but to focus the issue as to where it would be. For whatever reason, people of color have a higher incidence of maternal mortality.”

Sen. Bill Cassidy proves America doesn’t care about Black women
More
  • May 23, 2022

Black women are always expected to turn the other cheek when it comes to the people who mistreat them. We are always expected to be the bigger person, to rise above it all and act like we are indifferent to the hateful speech, abusive behavior and gaslighting that goes on in situations like this. 

Black women don’t owe Kevin Samuels anything

For theGrio, I wrote about how Black women are being asked to show grace to Kevin Samuels in light of his death, despite the fact that he had none for Black women when he was living.

More
  • May 7, 2022